What More Could I Want?

            If I could create my own “happy place”, it would have to be a cabin on a private, medium sized bass lake. I grew up fishing the rivers and lakes of Illinois. Some of my best childhood memories are tied to these trips. In fact, freedom to follow God is linked to fishing in an interesting sort of way. While I was in college, my father was able to purchase a small piece of property on an 11 acre lake. Summers were the best. We would spend humid, quiet evenings casting for bass. He had a small 14 foot boat that he left right on the edge of the lake. Our favorite game was to look for those special “hot spots” along the bank that might hold a promising largemouth. Who ever spotted it first got the first cast. It had better be a good one. If you missed, you didn’t get a second chance. We ended up getting pretty accurate.

When I graduated from college, I took a job in Southern California, and later moved to the San Francisco Bay area. Now the fishing buddies we more than 2000 mile away from each other. As God added children to our family, it became increasingly harder to travel home for summer visits to fish with him.

One cold February afternoon while preparing to go ice fishing on the lake, my father had a heart attack. It was the perfect storm scenario actually. He decided not to wait for the other guy to get there and had hand drilled four holes in the ice himself. He had no phone in the cabin. When his buddy arrived thirty minutes later, he had to walk to the nearest farm house to call. The ambulance got stuck in the snow. They had to go back to the farmhouse to get a truck to push the ambulance out of the snow. By the time he reached the hospital almost two hours had passed. He didn’t live through the night. After the shock wore off, I started processing my emotions. I felt anger and some guilt. I told myself that if I had been back in Illinois, it wouldn’t have happened. If I would have been there, I could have gotten him help sooner.

As I muddled through the grief, anger and guilt, I remembered a conversation with my father that had happened a few years earlier. I think we were coming home from a fishing trip. Although I can’t recall the destination, I remember the conversation as if it had happened yesterday. I remember asking my dad if he ever regretted me moving so far away to California. After giving me one of those “that’s one of the dumbest questions I’ve ever heard” looks, he simply asked me two questions. Are you doing what you are supposed to do? Yes, I said. Are you where God wants you to be? Again, I answered yes. He smiled at me and said, “What else can I ask for? All my children are serving God. What more can I want.”  Peace overwhelmed me. I know that my dad would have liked to spend more time fishing. But I also know he died a happy man.

Fishing buddies got my rod and my reel

Fishing buddies let me tell you how I feel

When you’re fishing with me there’s no place I’d rather be

Fishing buddies just you and me.

                                                                                                        M. D. Cross

Walls

I stand at the base of a wall. It’s is not a high or a substantial wall as walls go. It’s not the shortest or the highest wall, but resides somewhere in the middle. But to those seeing it for the first time, it looks infinite, unyielding, insurmountable. To those of us who have more experience, it is but an easy hop. Beyond this barrier lies another somewhat larger wall. Many walls exist beyond actually, each with increasing height and difficulty. Some enclose very specific environments. Some enclose open plains filled with a multitude of opportunities. Yet if one keeps going, you will eventually come to another higher wall.

            I have been over many walls, more than the average person. I have hopped the beginner’s wall, dawdled over the children’s wall, scaled the middle and high walls, and even soared over the higher wall. The wall of master I have never challenged. I have stood at the base surveying it several times. Each time I was called away to care for a more pressing need.

Truthfully, I know the best path to climb, the surest footholds and most of what lies beyond. I have collected volumes of stories, diagrams, and advice over these many years. I feel like I know the places beyond intimately, even though I have never been there.

Yet here I stand. My assignment, I volunteered actually, is to coach, prod, and encourage those trying to climb the middle wall. I love what I do. It never gets old. I especially enjoy those who, after having climbed to the heights, gratefully return to share their stories and successes with me.

Someday I will get the chance to explore the other walls. Until then, I will continue to help my group of wide-eyed, energetic, and often terrified “middle-wallers” to find the next hand or foot hold. “Up and over you go!...”

How Did I Get Where I Am?

How Did I Get Where I Am?

So how does one become a left hand man? It’s complicated, and simple. It’s complicated because there is a tremendous series of meetings and events that must all come tougher in the right place at the right time. As one looks at the past, it is a dynamic web of intersecting, interacting paths. It’s simple because God is a master craftsman in shaping lives with no waste, and with ultimate efficiency. If God’s life plan is followed, the follower always ends up eventually right were God wanted them. He even accounts for stupid mistakes, stubbornness, and bad choices on the part of the humans involved.

            The complicated for me started with my own personality and upbringing. I have always had a desire to “find out”. As soon as a toy would break, I would take it apart to see how it worked. (My mother claims I took apart some things before they broke; (I officially do not recall any of these events) I loved learning. I’ve kept a myriad of creatures these many years from butterflies to reptiles. I was always devouring science and nature books. My favorite television programs were Mutual of Omaha’s Wild Kingdom, Jacques Cousteau’s Underwater World, and National Geographic (anything). I still drive my children crazy by watching multiple episodes of “How It’s Made” on Saturday afternoons.

            My mother made sure we were “well rounded”. We took tennis and swimming lessons. She made us read books and take piano lessons. I even learned to play the violin. She sang to us, read to us and made sure we could also do both.

My Father was in the service oriented job of television repair. I learned from an early age to produce a good product and please the customer as much as possible. In my eyes, my dad could fix anything. He worked hard and with these extra fixing skills provided a good life for his wife and five children. We didn’t have all the newest things, but we had what we needed. Most of all, he was a true example of a Godly man.

My path has taken me through many jobs. I started with fast food and Hospital kitchens. In college I majored in Bible and Secondary Education. My minors were Science and Bible. Many at the time thought these were “odd” combinations, but they have turned out to be exactly what I needed.  I was also on the school maintenance crew and quickly moved into the title of “miscellaneous”, filling in for other jobs and fixing a variety of things. I also worked for two companies doing punch press and spot welding. I travelled for the college on a Gospel team for two summers. While teaching I have set tile, done industrial electrical, and helped in construction. My father in law has taught me to be an “above average” automobile mechanic. I have sold sodas at football games and even coached jr. high track.

I believe I learned the idea of being a servant not only from my father, but also from my college training. Service with a good attitude and heart was a core principle. It has never failed me in any of my life adventures. I have not always liked all of my circumstances as they happened, but they have lead and shaped me into what God has planned for me all along. Of this fact I am very sure. As I look back to my past adventures, I can see many of the intricate weaves that God has accomplished to bring glory to Himself, random meetings that turned out to be divine appointments; shattered dreams that became new avenues for success. And after all, isn’t that what it’s all really about, glorifying Him?