A Better Way

 

We have five children. We have nine grandchildren. Although I teach high school, I’m still fascinated with toddlers and lower elementary. Now don’t get me wrong, I do not want to teach at that level. I don’t think I have the energy to keep that up continually. I just like observing.

My wife has a gift of helping and ministering to younger mothers. She has many friends at church with children in the elementary ages. There are many mothers of my junior high students or my fellow teachers that also have younger elementary children. I have been watching. There is one young mother of three that has intrigued me. She has quite a mix of intelligence, energy and cuteness on her hands. But it is the way that she corrects and redirects them that fascinates me. Well, fascinates me and causes me to reflect inwardly.

I like to think I keep an organized & orderly classroom. But sometimes you have admit that even though things seem to be going well, there may be a better way. It’s one of the curses on teachers; you really are never good enough. There is always room for improvement.

In classroom discipline, I tend to get right to it. You might hear, “Please stop.” or, "Are you finished so we can go on?”.  It works, but it sometime lacks that outward compassion element. It’s something I’ve been working on. I’m sure we’ve all seen lists and memes that help to give better responses. A teacher named Mr. Mizrahi has a list. Here are just a few:

·         Let’s remember gentle hands     (“No Hitting” “Stop Fighting”)  

·         Outside is a good place for being loud     (No Shouting Inside the House!)  

·         Let’s try to breathe through these yucky feelings    (Calm Down, Stop Crying, No Whining)  

·         Let’s use kind words, please     (Don’t say that, don’t talk like that)  

·         Shoes are for your feet, remember?   (Stop throwing your shoes around the house)  

https://mrmizrahi.blog/2021/01/21/positive-phrases-to-use-instead-of-stop-no-dont/

These are all great, but sometimes they are hard to remember in the moment. It takes a lot of practice to break bad habits. That’s why my observations with this mother were so amazing. It caught my attention so captivatingly that I keep coming back to them.

I remember the first time I saw her struggling to get her child, the one with unlimited energy, to stand still so she could get done whatever she was doing. (I believe she was putting a jacket on. No one would have faulted this mother for saying, “Hold still!”. Instead I heard, I really appreciate your energy, but now it’s time to help mom do what she needs to do.” The child stopped and held still so mom could adjust their jacket. What a kind way to correct & redirect! I saw many more examples like this. It challenged me to look for better ways to kindly redirect in my classroom, especially with the 7^th graders. Now, don’t be deceived; I am still a work in progress. But I do hear myself giving more compliments while I’m correcting. Who’d a thought you could teach an old dog new tricks? Never keep looking for a better way. They are out there!

National Medal of Honor Day

 

This coming week, on March 25^th, we will celebrate National Medal of Honor Day. It honors members of our US military who, according to the Department of Defense, “distinguish themselves “through conspicuous gallantry and intrepidity at the risk of life above and beyond the call of duty”. It is our nation’s highest military award for valor. It was started in 1863 to honor 6 Members of Andrew’s Raiders for their participation in what is called The Great Locomotive Chase during the civil war.

Although I do not know anyone personally who has received this medal, my heart is still stirred when I read the various account of bravery for each recipient. There are awardees from virtually every war and conflict since 1863. It is important that we don’t forget their sacrifice to keep our country and the world free.

At present, there are over 3500 recipients, some of which have received the medal posthumously. There are sixty-one members still living. According to the National Park Service, there has only been one woman receive the award, Dr. Mary Edwards Walker. She was the first female Us Army surgeon. She spent four months in a Confederate prison when she was captured and charged with spying.

Here are some ways to celebrate National Medal of Honor Day.

• ·       Fly the U.S. Flag: Display the flag with pride at your home or business.
• ·       Visit Memorial Sites: Pay a visit to local memorial sites or the Tomb of the Unknown Soldier to honor those who have made the ultimate sacrifice.
• ·       Support Veteran Organizations: Donate to or volunteer with veteran service organizations.
• ·       Learn About Medal of Honor Recipients: Research the stories of Medal of Honor recipients and share their bravery with others.
• ·       Attend Events: Some federal, state, local, and military organizations may hold events recognizing Medal of Honor recipients.
• ·       Use Social Media: Share information about National Medal of Honor Day on social media using the hashtag #MedalOfHonorDay.
• ·       Adopt a Medal of Honor Gravesite
• ·       Attend a "retreat" ceremony honoring the fallen with "Taps" and the lowering of the flag
• ·       Attend ceremonies honoring living MoH recipients

You can read about the many brave recipients of this medal on the Congressional Medal of Honor Society web pages found here. 

https://www.cmohs.org/recipients/overview

https://homeofheroes.com/medal-of-honor/medal-of-honor-recipients/

Sources:

https://www.defense.gov/Multimedia/Experience/honors-for-valor

https://www.cmohs.org/news-events/blog/what-is-medal-of-honor-day-and-why-does-it-matter

Comparisons

 

Comparing things is a way of life. When we go to the grocery store, everything becomes a matter of comparison. This mango looks fresher, bigger, and nicer, than all the others. This package is a better deal according to price per unit. Sometimes we compare generic to brand name to see which we prefer. This line is shorter so it might be (ha!) faster. My advice for lines is, get in any line that I’m not in. I have a way of choosing the longest line – no matter what I do!

In reality, there’s nothing wrong with being “choosy” about our purchases. In fact, in some ways it involves being a good steward of our hard earned money. It gives us a sense of satisfaction to have not just settled for the “this will do” things in life.

Unfortunately we do the same thing with people. Here’s where we get into trouble. It causes division, racism, fights, division, anguish, and all kinds of depressive disorders due to comparison caused low self-esteem. Unfortunately, most of what we are doing is simply averaging, hoping to just end up better than someone else so we don’t see ourselves on the bottom.

Comparison, to be justified, needs a usable standard. As teachers, we go through several evaluations throughout the year. They may be scheduled, or just impromptu. They both serve the same purpose. The teacher is scored according to a set rubric that show categories of achievement. The skills desired are listed and defined. There's always room for growth, but you desire to be toward the top. I think teaching is one of the only occupations where you are never really good enough. Oh, well, it's part of the job.

For life it’s not so easy. There are many different standards and little agreement among them. Some just try to do more good than bad; some just try to be as good as the next guy. Others claim there are no absolutes, so do what you think is right. Then there is the group that has just given up.

As a Christian, the Bible say that our identity (and our worth) comes from a relationship with God himself. If we seek to please Him, we will have no need to compare ourselves to others. It doesn’t mean we will always measure up the metric, but leaving it the hands of the Just Judge can help take away the debilitating fear of competition we often face. If I please God, what else matters? What someone else thinks becomes less and less important. I am not saying that our friends shouldn’t give advice or help at times, but the focus needs to be on pleasing God, not men. It is the “Well done, thou good and faithful servant” as found in Matthew 25:21 that I am looking for.

We do not dare to classify or compare ourselves with some who commend themselves.

When they measure themselves by themselves and compare themselves with themselves,

they are not wise.   2 Corinthians 10:12 NIV

 

What Are You Hungry For?

 

In our last teacher’s meeting one of the young ladies in our Extended Care program challenged us to go deeper. We have been in a “rebuilding” year and have been praying for God’s provision and direction. She challenged us to join in several voluntary 3-day fasts at specific times during the rest of this year’s school year.

I am not foreign to fasting, but I cannot say I practice it regularly like many other of my friends. Many groups (religious or otherwise) practice fasting at various times of the year, often in association with prayer or meditation. Some people fast as a way to lose weight. Fasting can help you focus on your goals or desired outcomes that you would like to see accomplished. The main idea is to do without something (often food) for a specific period of time. During that time, if you think about what you are fasting from, you are encouraged to pray/meditate about why you are fasting. Since our times are voluntary, we also get to choose how we fast, and from what to fast. 

Several common fasts that I an associated with are:

• ·       Partial Day - No food until 10:00 AM or skipping 1 or more meals
• ·       Daylight Fast – waiting until sundown to eat
• ·       Water Only Fast – no food, but regular water intake
• ·       Juice Fast – no food, but fruit juices are ok
• ·       Daniel Fast – Fruit & vegetables only, no sweets, no meat, no caffeine
• ·       Social Media Fast – giving up all social media apps

So what kind of fast should I do? There are many kinds, each with its benefits and drawbacks. (Note: If you have any underlying medical conditions, I encourage you to check with your physician first.) Normally I would not share what fast I am on. I think it’s a personal thing between you and your Creator.

“When you fast, do not look somber as the hypocrites do, for they disfigure their faces to show others they are fasting. Truly I tell you, they have received their reward in full. But when you fast, put oil on your head and wash your face, so that it will not be obvious to others that you are fasting, but only to your Father, who is unseen; and your Father, who sees what is done in secret, will reward you. Matthew 6:16-18 (NIV)

However, since I’m blogging about it, I will share my choice for the next 3 days. For the first time, I have chosen to do a 3 day social media fast. I spend way to much time scrolling anyway. (Facebook I can easily avoid, but no Pokémon Go? (Ya, that’s gonna leave a mark.)  I plan to replace it with listening to scripture and praying for the needs of the school. I haven’t decided what I am going to do for the other times.

So what are you hungry for? Maybe fasting can help.

 

Take these as they are – possible helps. I have not read everything but they looked helpful.

https://www.biblestudytools.com/bible-study/topical-studies/what-christians-need-to-know-about-fasting-and-prayer.html

https://www.crossroads.net/media/articles/what-are-the-types-of-spiritual-fasting

https://www.health.com/fasting-8620781

Find the Way Out!

One of the new fads in team building and just general recreation is the escape room. They seem to be popping up everywhere. I for one have not, and unless monetarily coerced (meaning my boss is making me and he/she is paying for it) will not be attending. I have zero desire to participate. I mean, isn’t life itself one big escape room? We face choices and temptations of all kinds each and every day and hopefully choose the right decision. Why do I need an enhancement on that?

I have never been really competitive. Video games are not my thing, especially the ones that are timed. In fact the only game I play (not counting Pokémon Go which I started so my grandson and I had something to do during Covid) is FreeCell. One of the things I like about it is that each game has a solution. The other plus is that I can play it at my own speed. I have decided to not let a game go until I solve it. It may mean restarting multiple times, but it helps me struggle through the process. I think my highest is 10.

So how does all this relate to real life? Like I mentioned earlier, life is a continuing series of choices. Last week I needed to get some mice for the snake in my classroom. With things being so tight in this economy, I did not want to ask for it out of the budget at home. (The school budget is just as bad.) I was amazed at the different scenarios that rambled through my head. Some were entrepreneurial; others were a mix of minor theft, embezzlement, and or other petty crimes. It’s not that I really seriously contemplated misappropriating cash from somewhere, but the thoughts were there none-the-less. As I faced and rejected each one, I remembered the verse that talks about a way of escape. I remember praying and asking for God to show me that escape route. Turns out we had a little extra money, and all I had to do was ask in the first place.

Most of us would not even think about robbing a bank (at least I hope not!). But borrowing a little from “Peter to pay Paul” might be a bigger temptation. Maybe it’s not money; maybe its food, online shopping, or little white lies. It doesn’t really matter what it is. We all have those seemingly little temptations that we face on a daily basis. The scriptures say there is a way of escape. We just have to find it.

No temptation has overtaken you except what is common to mankind. And God is faithful; he will not let you be tempted beyond what you can bear. But when you are tempted, he will also provide a way out so that you can endure it. 1 Corinthian 10:13

Focus

 For many years, February has been one of my least favorite months. It has a kind of sad, somber tone to it. I have always been glad to get through it. The strangest part is that for a long time I was not really sure why. It wasn’t until I broke it down into good/bad lists that I understood my feelings.

For me, it contains some of the worst days of the year. It’s traditionally the coldest month of winter.  It’s the month I usually sit down and figure out how much taxes are gonna cost me this time. It’s the shortest month. And it’s the month in which my father passed away.
Oddly enough, it also contains some of the best days of the year. There are two, four day weeks, a special treat for school teachers. Valentine’s Day is the anniversary of our first date.
Two of my precious grandchildren and my youngest son were born in February. The days are starting to get longer, and I’m starting to plant indoors in anticipation of spring. In Arizona, spring training is in full swing. All in all, February is a decent month. So what gives? Why do I sometimes feel it’s a bummer?

I think the key is focus. When we are using microscopes in my Biology class, we often like to use “deep well” slides. They are slides with a slight dished-out area in it. They allow you to see things that are a bit bigger without squishing them flat. The problem is, because of the depth of field it gives, you have to know where to focus. You can focus on the top of things, on the bottom, or somewhere in-between. One part will look perfectly clear. The other parts will be blurry or even nonexistent.

 Focus in life, is all about what I spend my time thinking about. If I continually dwell on the negative, it will drag me down. If I focus on the cold, loss, and taxes, I will trudge through the month head-down, hoping for it to end. But if I look to all the great things I’ve been given in February, I can gratefully smile my way into spring. Now that I think about it, February is not all that bad. No butterflies yet, but they will be here soon. Yes, I choose to focus on the best of February. Time to put on some warm socks and go to some birthday parties!

“Finally, brothers and sisters, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if anything is excellent or praiseworthy—think about such things.” Philippians 4:8 NIV

Do Something Good!

 

It’s Valentine’s Day weekend, a time of love and adoration. But why only one day? The Bible tell use to “love one another” and love your neighbor as yourself”. Surely that means daily, every day, the whole year through? Doing something good for someone else for no reciprocal reason is the ultimate expression of selflessness and love. It’s what we are called to.

Ephesians 2:10 says, “For we are God’s handiwork, created in Christ Jesus to do good works, which God prepared in advance for us to do”.

The Strong's Concordence says this about that word works: 2041 érgon (from ergō, "to work, accomplish") – a work or worker who accomplishes something. érgon("work") is a deed (action) that carries out (completes) an inner desire (intension, purpose). Think about that. God already has a list of good things he wants us to do. All we have to do is join him. So how do I find out which “good works” are on my list? Well, some are obvious. Obey His commands. Trust in God. I’ve already mentioned, “Love one another” and “Love your neighbor as yourself”.  That should keep us busy most of the day. Then when we have extra time, we can look for projects that are suited to our talents.

For my wife and me, God has lead us into helping the poor, homeless, and otherwise needy. In summer months, we make “goody bags” with water, snacks, some kind of clothing item like socks, a New Testament, and a card we made with the Gospel message. When we can afford it, she likes to put $5 Dollar Tree gift cards in. In the winter months it may contain a scarf or hand warmers. I know that the common thinking is that all homeless are just drug addicted bums, but we have found this to be a great oversimplification. Although this is not uncommon, there is also a large element of mental illness involved. Some are homeless or addicted because they are mentally ill; others are mentally ill or addicted because homelessness has taken a great toll. In any case they are still someone’s son, daughter, and family.

So this Valentine’s Day, by all means let that special person know they are loved. But take some time to look around. Is there someone in need who’s all alone? Be their valentine also. A hot meal, a warm coat, or a gift card with a note of encouragement can go a long way.

Years ago my daughters loved to listen to a group called Avalon. I leave you with one of their songs that has grown on me over time, and often brought me to tears. The chorus says,

For as long as I shall live, I will testify to love

I'll be a witness in the silences when words are not enough

With every breath I take, I will give thanks to God above

For as long as I shall live, I will testify to love

 

Songwriters: Henk Pool / Robert T. Riekerk / Ralph Van Manen / Paul Field

Testify To Love lyrics © Universal/mca Music Holland B.v., Emi Music Publishing (wp) Ltd