Do I Allow People to Change?

There he was – a Facebook recommendation from my high school days. Some people have changed so much that I struggle to recall who they are. But not him. I’d recognize that face anywhere. He was what you might call, one of the school bullies. Well at least to a geek like me. Handsome, good at sports, he was one of the popular crowd. I can remember it like it was yesterday. There we were in an all-school assembly. He and his cronies were sitting behind me in the next row. Throughout the whole event, they kept throwing pieces of paper at the back of my head. It didn’t hurt; not physically anyway. But I could feel the embarrassment rising as my ear began to feel hot. I felt trapped, like a rat. I really didn’t want to make a scene and tell someone. Back then, snitches got stitches. There was no way I was going to turn around and say something. That would just escalate it. Punching him was out of the question. I only weighed 114lbs soaking wet. His friend was 6’3” and a linebacker on the football team. He was no runt either.

So I took it. I got over it, and buried it along with all the other uncomfortable memories from high school. At least I thought I did, until now. Facebook friend? Ha! I think not. And then came the memories of how I also had been inconsiderate of other people and their feelings. But that was then; this is now. I’ve changed. That’s when it hit me. Why was I not allowing “him” to change? High school was some of the weirdest years of our lives. For all I know, he could be a totally different person. I know I am.

I honestly don’t know if I will ever add him to my Facebook list of friends. My wife says I have too many already, so I have been very selective of late. What I do know is that I need to be more forgiving of past people and events and give them the opportunity to show that they too have grown, just as I have. The Apostle Paul summed it up this way.

 “Brothers and sisters, I do not consider myself yet to have taken hold of it. But one thing I do: Forgetting what is behind and straining toward what is ahead, I press on toward the goal to win the prize for which God has called me heavenward in Christ Jesus." Philippians 3:13-14

You, Facebook guy, wherever you are, I hope you are growing better each day. You have my permission.